Honoring Ancestors - Honoring Yourself

It is that time of the year when we begin to honor the introspective side to ourselves what with winter upon us and Halloween just having passed.
I just recently moved and found a box of old photographs of loved ones who have since passed on and it brought a tear to my eyes. Honoring our ancestors can bring us renewed perspective and peace within our own lives. These are tumultuous times that we live in, but if we put it in perspective it is no more or less disconcerting than what many of our relatives experienced in their lifetimes. As an example, my grand father was born in 1901 and went through the Great Depression 1929 to 1941, World War I which began in 1914 and lasted until 1918, and World War II which began in 1939 and lasted until 1945. I think back to all that he saw and experienced and I think to myself that life is not nearly as hard although it can seem that way at times. Perspective is an important part of living in reality.

If you are experiencing trouble with your job, your children, or with your significant other, it would be worthwhile to sit for a moment and think about all that you have to be thankful for. I am not going to turn this into a "focus on the positive" blog, but I wanted to remind you all that the Universe gives you more of what you focus on....so - Focus on the good stuff!

Namaste~ Karen

Getting rid of the old to make room for the new!

I am writing this post because I have spent many hours with tears in my eyes working through the process of getting rid of the old to make room for the new. It seems like yesterday that I moved from Colorado back to Connecticut with a tiny baby girl over my shoulder, a divorce decree, (with the ink barely dry), in my hands, and a depression so dark and so deep that I wasn't sure that I would survive it at the time. The psychological experts say that childbirth, job loss, divorce, death (both my dogs passed on), and moving are some of the most stressful events that anyone can go through in their lifetime. I did them ALL in one year - 2001. I refer to it as my "not so good" year. I am over it now! Time to move on!

 Many of you who have move can appreciate what I am referring to when I say that it is not only physically exhausting, but it is emotionally draining as well. The positive side of it all is that it is a way to "free oneself" of unneeded and unwanted attachments to people and things! I have gotten rid of legal papers, old files, clothes, shoes, toys, books, and fortunately (or unfortunately) friendships that no longer were serving me and my growth as a spiritual being. Along with the giving away of "stuff," I have found HOPE, for the future, and a new positive outlook.

I would urge all of you to look through your "emotional closets, " as well as your physical surroundings to see if you are carrying burdens that you can now let go of forever. The moment is NOW - LIVE IN THE PRESENT. Hope for the Future, but seize the moment!

Those are my musings. Blessings. Karen

FRIENDS ~ Let Go and Relax

Friend ~ The title is loaded with all kinds of meaning.

Why am I writing about friendship? Because many of my clients struggle with what a "real friend" is supposed to be or do. Are friends required to be at your beck and call simply because you personally are going through a crisis? I think that all of us need to examine how much we LEAN ON our friends, and keep in mind that they too have their own "crosses to bear." You never know when you are asking someone to "lighten your emotional burden" only to find out that they are going through a tough time themselves.

  According to Wikipedia: 

The value of friendship is often the result of friends consistently demonstrating the following:

• The tendency to desire what is best for the other
• Sympathy and empathy
• Honesty, even in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth
• Mutual understanding and compassion; ability to go to each other for emotional support
• Enjoyment of each other's company
• Trust in one another
• Positive reciprocity — equal give-and-take between the two parties
• The ability to be oneself, express one's feelings and make mistakes without fear of judgement.

Many people call themselves Friend, although they do not act in a manner consonant with the tenets of friendship. They may take advantage of what you do or who your are in the name of "friendship." But are they really friends?

Keep in mind that if you perform some task, or have some skill in a any given area, and they ask for your services gratis, or in trade, but then get impatient and go pay for the same service elsewhere and think nothing of it. Perhaps, that is not a real friend.

After all, friendship should be instantaneous and should provide immediate gratification, to your friend's satisfaction right? Not exactly..............

If you find yourself surrounded by "negative nellies," "users," or friends who try to "keep you all to themselves," you need to ask yourself if you really need these people in your life. Sometimes you will decide that you do, and sometimes you do not. Having good friends is like "weeding a garden" - if you allow people to take advantage of you what are they?

Some of the best friends that I have had over the years I barely see, and rarely speak with, and yet when I call or write it is as if there needs to be no excuse given (they know we are all busy), no apology, (for what? They understand). With others, and with the advent of the internet, I have not personally seen them in person for many years, although we live within an hour of one another, and it doesn't feel like friends the way it used to. Nevertheless, if they reach out to you as much as you try to connect with them, then perhaps the "old spark" of familiarity still exists.

I had one friend, once, where I always drove to see her. Thought of her as a "soul sister" of sorts. Set aside time in my busy life to be there for her and connect. She would inevitably call last minute and cancel, again, with an excuse of one sort or another. Finally, I realized that the friendship was one sided. I stopped calling. The friendship ended because I gave it no energy. If something or someone is negative, starve it by giving it no energy.

At times in your life, you will have many friends especially when you are young. As you age, your friends may get sick or move, or change. Allow the tides of friendship to flow freely. Some shells of friendship will wash up on the beach intact, others will be dashed on the rocks and broken never to be fixed. It is o.k. - you will make new friends. Let go and relax. They are either there for you in a way that does not create stress or you might consider letting them go. Be at peace with your choices and with your friends. Those are my musings.

Blessings~ In love and light, Karen

Living Each Day

We all get caught in the day to day frustrations. We have to go to work, bank, grocery shopping, etc...but, sometimes there are things in life that make us stop and think. A wedding, a death, a birth, a picnic with friends, are all moments to stop and savor the moment no matter the joy or the sorrow. If we don't live each day purposefully, we miss the unique opportunity to live "in the moment." I speak with people each day who are focused on money, (fleeting), opportunities, (Ego), what other people think, (futility), family dynamics, (frustrating and unchanging), relationships, (expectations which are often too high). What all of these have in common is that they all will go "by the by" as my grandmother used to say. Try not to let other people's judgements on you or what you do or do not do define you. I often use the example of dropping a pen in front of my client and asking: "If I drop this pen in front of you, are you obligated to pick it up?" They appear startled at first, and then a smile begins to cross their face. The illusion is lifted and they can "live in the moment" with the realization that they are not the reality that others have created for them. They do not HAVE to do anything and that is FREEING because they finally realize that what we focus on is a CHOICE. Choose to focus on the GOOD things as much as possible and good things will come to you. Example, loosing your house to foreclosure....freedom from your mortgage and the ability to move about the country freely! Losing your job, you get to start something new that may serve you better and that you truly enjoy. Live each day with purpose and conviction. Spirit wants you to be happy. Embrace today!

Toxic People - Boundaries Needed

We all have them, people that we run from when we see their names light up on our phones. These are the folks where NOTHING ever goes right in their world!  Whether they are our friends, relatives or co-workers everything in us says "run" "hide" "leave me alone" the minute they contact us. How to cope? Boundaries can be your friend, and you don't have to be rude to be firm. If you do pick up the phone, calmly explain that you are very busy at the moment and although you would love to chat you really don't have the time. If that doesn't work, send them an email that says, "got your message," was thinking of you, but couldn't talk due to family and work obligations. Sometimes it is o.k. to just be "unavailable." We are all so connected what with our iphones, androids, etc....Do you really need to know that your friend is at the bank this VERY INSTANT? Take a deep breath, relax, and as they say: "Keep calm & Carry On." Use a little psychic self defense, and take a bath in Epsom Salts to get the negative stuff off of you! Smudge with white sage! Light a white candle! Get out in the sunlight! Deep Breaths!

“The most important skill in staying calm is not to lose sleep over small issues. The second most important skill is to be able to view all issues as small issues.”

 Paul Wilson quotes

If Life is a Game, These are the Rules

Hello everyone,
I've been reading a book called "If Life is a Game, These are the Rules" by Cherie Carter-Scott, Ph.D. and I have found it to be a wonderful guide for reflection on a daily basis even if you only have ten minutes of peace in your life to reflect. I recommend it highly.

Many people come to a psychic for advice when they already know that the answers that they are seeking are already inside of them. Some of the best readings that I have done are those where my clients leave saying, I knew all of that! Of course you did. You only forgot momentarily because your sub-conscious and your conscious mind were not working in unison. You are a busy person, like everyone, and having someone who does not know the inner workings of your life circumstances mirror to you that indeed your life is as you perceive it to be is powerful. It helps you to stay in touch with you so that you can make better decisions. Knowledge is power, and readings are powerful tools for personal introspection and change.

Consider having a reading if you have not had one in awhile, you will be glad you did! Always in the Light, Karen

Why it is important to "Walk Your Talk" with Children & Adults

Recently, a woman came to my office for a reading. This in and of itself would not be startling as that is what I do, "psychic readings." However, she showed up smelling of alcohol from the night before and was about 25 minutes late for her reading. As she sat down, I could see that she was really exhausted and very worried. I began by telling her about her son who was not motivated to go to school, had been doing drugs, and was apparently yelling at her in a threatening way. The woman nodded that indeed this was so, and exclaimed that she just didn't know what to do about her son because he was too big now to "muscle" out the door to school and he refused to go regularly. She was genuinely concerned as a mother, but did not know why this was happening. I told her that apparently her son had witnessed both emotional and physical violence as a child based on her past relationships. He had witnessed his father doing drugs and his mother drinking heavily, and was doing what they had taught him to do unwittingly - be emotionally and physically abusive. The woman seemed confused by what I had just told her. I explained that children learn to behave by what they witness in the home. If you are out of control, or the environment that they grow up in is "out of control," then that is what they think is normal and they will act accordingly. I explained that if she expected her son to be sober, then she would need to model sobriety. If you expect respect, then one has to give it as well. This mom really did want good things for her son, and she began to sob at the reality of the life that she had thus far modeled for her boy. I told her that today could be the day that she changed her behavior and helped him to make better choices as well through her example. She agreed, and I was both relieved and glad that she was able to really hear what Spirit was trying to get through to her. "Walk your talk." Not an easy journey, but a necessary one. Namaste, Karen